New Year's Eve

Today it is snowing, and husband has taken DD17 out to drive. She got her license last winter, but had her surgery soon after and couldn't drive for six weeks (nor wanted to). So, she doesn't have much experience in very bad weather. And while I am certainly a coward in driving with teenagers, husband's nerves are much better. She has to learn, and he's a better teacher than I am. I'd like to get her into a defensive driving course, but they are not very near by and usually at inconvenient times for us. I probably should take one myself.

The holidays are almost over, and for the most part were pleasant and relaxing. I did catch the cold the kids brought home, but I seem to be over it in a very short period of time. I drank lots of tea and made lots of chicken soup, and other than some lingering sinus issues, I feel pretty good. Now we just have to finish up the sweets and the rich(er) holiday foods hanging around, and we'll be ready to usher in the New Year on a hopefully healthy note.

I'm not sorry to see 2009 end. It didn't start very well and illness did seem to dominate it in one form or another in my extended family. However, I have no desire to stay up until midnight to toss the calendar into the fire like I did at the end of 2004. That was a symbolic gesture I planned for a long time that year.

So my wish for 2010 is good health for all near and dear. Because without that, everything else is meaningless.

Monday Musings

The weekend's big snowstorm was a welcome respite during this crazy busy time. We were stuck at home, and did have to miss a family event out of state, but the forced downtime was good. I did more baking, went to a neighbor's party, and finished decorating. Better late than never. Sometimes I have to push myself to get into the spirit of the season. Often I wonder, why bother? All the trappings can seem meaningless when I get into a mental funk as I start dreading January and all its memories.

I called the hospital and asked to have an MRI, radiation follow-up, and oncology visit on one day. I asked for a day in late January, once DD17 is finished with her mid-terms. They will get back to me once they coordinate the three different appointments. That's how it works.

So I will try not think of that visit until I have to...I've done my part in booking it. The rest is out of my hands. Meanwhile, we have a bit more shopping to do, and then hopefully can really catch our breath and enjoy the spiritual part of the season. There is a small shrine nearby, decorated with lights, and piped-in (religious) Christmas music. It's very nice and very peaceful, and we try to get there once during the season to enjoy a nighttime stroll. (There is another, bigger shrine a bit further away, but we only went once and then crossed it off our list. Let's just say the busloads of people and the excessive lighting displays were the opposite of peaceful. For some reason, the place just screams "velvet Jesus" to me, like velvet Elvis.)

The older two kids have caught colds. There's a bad one going around, and I don't think my two are getting enough rest. Both have a lot of homework and stay up late finishing it. DD17 is just slower with her homework, while DS16 doesn't get home from sports until dinner time. I'm hoping DS13 doesn't catch it, because then I'll have the asthma worry to deal with. But I really can't complain...they've been relatively healthy so far this school season. Their nutrition is good and they get enough exercise, so I hope that's enough to fight off most bugs, and make any illness they do catch of short duration.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to stay healthy too. Trying not to dip into the Christmas cookies (I froze most of them right away). Trying to exercise daily, and include an outdoor walk, too. 'Cause it would all fall apart if Mom gets sick.

A Christmas Cookie...Chocolate Cranberry Biscotti

Biscotti are a twice-baked cookie, traditionally flavored with almonds or anise. The dough is first shaped into a log and baked. After cooling, the log is cut into slices and the slices are baked again, producing a crisp cookie perfect for dunking into milk, coffee, or even wine.

I've never been crazy about traditional biscotti, but recently saw a recipe in Parade magazine for a chocolate and cranberry-studded version. This one's more to my liking, and I see now how you can make infinite varieties of biscotti. I'll be sure to try other flavors, too.

Chocolate Biscotti

2 cups flour
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
3/4 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
6 Tbsp. unsalted butter, softened
1 cup sugar
2 large eggs, lightly beaten
3/4 cup dried cranberries
3/4 cup mini chocolate chips

Sift together dry ingredients. Beat butter and sugar together until very smooth, then beat in the eggs. Mix in dry ingredients until blended. Fold in cranberries and chips. Divide dough in half. Put pieces on opposite sides of a parchment-lined baking sheet. Shape each into a 12-inch-long, 1/2-inch-thick log. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes; cool 20 minutes. Slice into 1/2-inch-thick cookies. Stand them up in the baking sheet, separated; bake for 15 minutes. Cool to room temperature.

These will continue to crisp up for a few hours after cooling. They make a pretty and tasty addition to any cookie tray, and freeze very well.

A Christmas Cookie...Chocolate Crinkles

Christmas cookies are a once-a-year indulgence. Holiday treats are part of every heritage, and the key is moderation. I'd rather my children consume real food--no matter how rich--than be tempted by the platters of store-bought goods and candies that are everywhere this time of year.

A couple of years ago I started baking for the holidays. I mean really baking. When DD17 was in treatment and we were stuck inside away from crowds, I decided to make as many different kinds of Christmas cookies as I could. Call it therapy, a creative outlet, or maybe even a way to jumpstart better memories.

So now I'm the designated Christmas cookie baker in my extended family, and other people around me have come to expect cookies, too. Everyone has their favorites, but I'll always try something new and occasionally even drop a favorite cookie recipe (when DD17 was diagnosed with nut allergies, I sadly stopped making most of the nut cookies which are so popular around the holidays).

Here's a recipe for Chocolate Crinkles. I've modified a couple of recipes to come up with this one, and you can certainly modify it further with different chocolates or deeper coffee flavor (one recipe I've seen uses espresso powder, of which I've never used, but I suspect is delicious here).

Chocolate Crinkles

1/2 cup butter
4 squares unsweetened chocolate
2 cups sugar
4 eggs
2 tsp. vanilla
1/2 tsp. salt
2 cups flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. instant coffee granules
1 cup powdered sugar

In small saucepan, melt butter and chocolate. Let cool slightly. In mixer, blend sugar and chocolate/butter mixture. Add eggs, one at a time, until well mixed. Add vanilla. Sift together salt, flour, baking powder, and coffee granules. Add to mixer and blend well. Chill several hours, or overnight. Heat oven to 350. Drop teaspoonfuls of dough into powdered sugar. Roll around and shape into balls. Place about 2 inches apart on greased cookie sheets. Bake 10-12 minutes. Move to racks to cool. Makes about 50 cookies.

Weekend

We picked out a Christmas tree today. We laugh about how efficient we are now, compared to when the kids were much younger. Back then, we would drive 45 minutes in October to a Christmas tree farm, tag the tree we liked, and return in December to cut it down and bring it home. We felt so bucolic. Now we barely have a free hour on most weekends to get to the local nursery and pick one out, pre-cut. It's no longer an event, just another item on the to-do list.

Today it's sunny out and very cold. I've noticed that my mood is so much more positive when the sun is shining this time of year. I've tried to get out for a walk most days...it really does help me get out of my head. I've been putting off calling the hospital and scheduling the January appointments with MRI, oncology, and radiation. I think I have to ask for a gradient echo MRI this time (I'll have to check The Notebook, where I journal details of every appointment and hospitalization. And it's a place to jot down questions or concerns for future appointments). The gradient echo MRI will look for cavernous malformations, as more can develop. Add in the spinal MRI (brain tumor cells can travel to the spine) and it's sure to be a long day.

DD17 had a friend over for dinner last night and then the two of them went to a holiday play at the high school. She was looking forward to this all week. I love when she says "I'm happy." In some ways her life is so complex, and in other ways it is so simple. She has very few teenage dramas in her life. I guess major illness can do that to you.

I'd like to bake some Christmas cookies, but I don't know if I'll have much time tomorrow. And I *have* to get started with Christmas shopping. We've cut way, way back the last few years, but there's still plenty to do. Not sure why the holidays snuck up on us, but they did.

A Meat Sauce for Pasta

Thanks goodness for pasta. We must eat it three times a week, with leftovers going to lunches or even snacks (hey, I have teenagers). It fills up the kids, is economical, and is very, very flexible. Just change the sauce and you have a different meal.

Meat sauces are always popular, where the meat adds flavor but is not the star attraction. A smaller amount of meat goes a long way if simmered in a sauce. And a meat sauce makes a heartier pasta dish, perfect for winter appetites. One meat sauce I make is a slow-simmered pork sauce, using bone-in spareribs. The other day, however, I was rifling through my collection of old Cook's Illustrated and noticed a recipe for a meat sauce using beef short ribs. I was intrigued, since I had never tried a sauce with beef ribs before.

Beef short ribs are meatier and bigger than pork spareribs. They are also a bit more expensive, but for use in a pasta dish, you need one small package. These look huge, but really are mostly bones.

According to the recipe, liberally salt and pepper the ribs and saute in about a tablespoon of olive oil, browning on all sides.

Remove the ribs to a plate, and pour off all but one teaspoon of the oil. Add one onion, finely chopped, and cook for about 2 minutes. Add 1/2 cup of wine and cook for another few minutes, or until wine reduces. Then add one 28-oz can of diced tomatoes and the ribs. Simmer for about 2 hours, or until meat is tender.

Remove ribs and shred meat, returning meat to pot. Serve over pasta. Sprinkle with grated Parmesan or Romano.

It was very good, and very similar to how I make a meat sauce with pork ribs. I don't usually chop the onion, preferring to saute it whole with the meat and removing it before serving. This gives a more subtle onion flavor, without pieces floating in the sauce. And normally I don't shred the meat, serving it separately for whoever would like a piece.

You can do the same thing with some small lamb bones, which are my favorite--absolutely delicious. The technique is the same. Of course, you can saute some finely chopped carrots and celery with the onion, further enriching the sauce, and picky little appetites need never know.

H1N1 Update

The high school flu clinic went so well that the Board of Health nurses wanted the same volunteers to work another clinic for elementary school-age children and young adults only. I said I would work it if I could get my own son a shot, even though he fell between the two age groups. They said no. Guess I'm not a good negotiator.

So I called the pediatrician and begged to have DS12 put on a priority list. They agreed with me he appeared to be falling through the cracks, but would put him at the bottom of their list until more shots came in.

And more shots finally did arrive...he will be getting his shot after school on Thursday. The office initially said they were running a clinic later in the week, but then offered to give him his shot at a time of my convenience. Maybe someone finally felt sorry for me. I am so glad I will be able to cross this worry off my list.

Cancer-fighting Citrus

My favorite winter fruits are starting to appear in the market--clementines! They are so sweet and so portable, a perfect lunchbox snack for kids as well as adults.

Everyone knows citrus fruits contain Vitamin C, but more importantly, they can help fight cancer too. Oranges and other citrus fruits provide several anticancer phytochemical compounds, according to Foods to Fight Cancer. And the book Anticancer: A New Way of Life specifically recommends the grated zest of tangerines as a food that fights brain cancer. (Of course, organic tangerines make sense if you are going to eat the zest.)

We love citrus as is, or stirred into yogurt. DD17 will stir tangerine zest into yogurt, too. And most of us will have a glass of juice in the morning, with our breakfast. Citrus really is an easy addition to the cancer-fighting diet.

A More Cheerful Post

Yesterday's melancholy post deserves a rebuttal today. There are good things about the holidays, certainly, and reasons to look forward to them. Here, then, are my favorite parts of the holiday season:

• Two of the kids are in their school bands, and the bands are very, very good. The holiday concerts are wonderful and celebratory, and it's nice to gather afterwards with the families at a reception.
• Christmas cookies: I do go overboard baking many different kinds, because I will only do it this one time of the year. We all have our favorites, and look forward to those as well as any new ones I might try.
• Family games nights...we love our board games (Scrabble, Yahtzee, Monopoly) and the competition is fierce. Really, what's better than being couped up in the dark, cold winter with no where to go and the family gathered around the table? I know I will cherish memories of these times, thankful the kids still liked us enough to want to hang with us.
• Celebrations of lights...tree lightings, religious/shrines lit up with walking trails through the displays.
• Extended family gatherings, even though sometimes they can be stressful!
• After dark sledding in the yard...we have spotlights out the back and a safe steep incline. Okay, I'll admit it....I do insist on helmets.
• A fire in the fireplace.

Amazing what a good night's sleep will do for my perspective on the season.

First Snow

It snowed last night, not for the first time, but this time it appears to be sticking around. The first substantial snowfall of the season is always so pretty and so dramatic. It truly takes your breath away.

The snow started during last night's holiday concert at the high school. It was magical emerging from the school into the parking lot and seeing the snowflakes coming down, as if on cue. Of course, the driving was dicey, but we live about 15 minutes from the school, so it was OK.

Maybe the snow will put me in the holiday spirit. The Christmas season has been difficult for me the last five years because DD17's symptoms started at the tail end of the holiday season, and she was diagnosed very soon afterwards. So the holidays are always a reminder of "that time." And last year's deja-vu-like MRI at the five-year mark was like a knife cutting into an old wound.

I know the holidays are often difficult for lots of people, not just me. The rampant consumerism and the pressure to celebrate just add stress to already stressed lives. I just wonder if I will ever enjoy the season the same way again, before cancer became a part of our lives. Well, it's just another reminder to take it one day at a time, and just let be what is. There's no right or wrong way to feel, and I just have to accept how I'm feeling at any given moment, and not fight it. It helps to focus on the religious aspect of the holiday, and separate that out from all the rest. Of all things, that keeps me centered.

I know, though, that Spring seems far away.

Staying Involved--Helicopter Parents

Tonight the high school has parent-teacher conferences planned. They are very short...obviously not the time nor place to discuss major issues. But because they are so short, we always go to meet the teacher and put a face to a name. Did my parents go to my high school conferences? I don't really remember, but it's doubtful. It was a different time.

We don't really need to go...the kids do well in school and usually there's not much to say other than "nice to meet you" and hear (hopefully) how well they are doing. But all the kids *want* us to go. Is that weird? I don't know...I'm just glad they want us involved (to a point) in their academic lives. Not that they could keep me out if they wanted to.

Am I a helicopter parent? Time magazine recently had an article on helicopter parents and I confess seeing something of myself in there. But I guess I don't really care. One thing I do know is that life is short and our time with our children is shorter. I will embrace every moment I can be involved with and part of their lives, as long as they want me there. So take that, Time.

I fully expect to have frequent texts and emails and cell phone calls from DD17 when she goes off to college. Thank goodness we have so many ways to keep in touch. I would worry constantly about her in particular if she couldn't check in often. I do encourage her to solve her own problems when she comes to me, but I will not disengage.

Tonight will be the last parent-teacher conference I will ever attend for DD17. That phase of our lives is ending. I am glad I have no regrets for the time I spent with her. My only regret is that it's going by much too quickly.

H1N1 Clinic

The high school held its H1N1 clinic as scheduled, and the older two received their shots. I volunteered at the clinic, filling out paperwork as the kids came through at their scheduled times. It was very interesting and very organized. Kudos to our school nurse, who said she's been planning this since August.

The middle school, however, has not had a clinic yet nor is one planned. You would think both schools would fall under the same umbrella, but they are in different towns. And, based on some comments I heard, there is some unnecessary bureaucracy and turfdom issues involved. Big sigh...why can't we all play nice?

Anyway, I was quite impressed by this mass inoculation. There weren't any problems, aside from just a handful of nervous kids. If the government (local, national) could get it together, I would almost suggest this is the way to go for all flu clinics. Three hours of injections and a good percentage of the school population is covered. Easier for the parents, too. (Obviously, many people opted out, or already got a shot from their healthcare provider.)

Now the hunt is on for a shot for DS12, the child who really needs one.

Leftovers...and a Memory

Lots of leftovers this weekend. Mostly vegetables, stuffing, and potatoes. Not too much turkey, surprisingly. We'll eat a meal or two, and then I'll make turkey soup. To a large stockpot, I'll add the turkey carcass, an onion, a few cloves of smashed garlic, some carrots and celery and cover with water. Simmer for a couple of hours, and then add a cup (or two) of white wine. Simmer a few more hours. The wine brightens the flavor of the soup; cooked poultry bones make a weak broth.

Turkey and trimmings will forever remind me of the hospital. DD17's protocol involved hospitalizations during chemo cycles, so she could be monitored for adverse side effects. Our hospital provided rooming-in for parents, so hospital food was part of my diet for a year. I never wanted to leave and find a restaurant. It just didn't seem that important, and I didn't want to wander around the city by myself. Mostly, I didn't like to leave her side. So if I didn't think to bring food, I'd have to eat hospital food. Parents were given vouchers to use for meals, and there weren't a lot of places to eat in the hospital. Usually, I just ordered off the patient menu.

Frequently, I ordered the turkey dinner. It was bland, and bland was comforting. It also gave off a less offensive odor to DD17...I had to be careful that what I ordered didn't contribute to her nausea. Or I had to eat it in the hall outside her room. Those were lonely, sad meals...the lights would be dimmed, the t.v. on low, and DD17 heavily medicated with antimetics while receiving chemotherapy intravenously. We were in a cocoon, waging a silent battle with the foe.

You'd think I'd really dislike turkey now. After eating it so often that year, you'd think I'd swear it off. Truthfully, I never liked it all that much to begin with. If I had to choose a poultry dish, I'd probably pick chicken. Now I guess turkey's resumed it's usual place, the once or twice-a-year meal. But I know, for me at least, it will always symbolize something more--comforting sustenance during a very difficult time.

Pre-Thanksgiving

We are staying home this year for Thanksgiving so I am cooking a turkey. I think I can pull it off, because I consider it a big bird and I roast whole chickens all the time. As everyone knows, it's all about the timing and the side dishes. Many years ago I hosted Thanksgiving and if I remember correctly, it went well.

My parents and my brother are coming, so that will be eight of us--definitely manageable. Besides the turkey, I will make cranberry stuffing, "smashed potatoes" (leave skin on, mash coarsely with butter and salt and pepper, then bake until browned on top), butternut squash, and sliced sweet potatoes with ginger and molasses. My mother will bring acorn squash, brussel sprouts, stuffed mushrooms (for my Dad), and asparagus (just to add more green). I'm not very confident in my gravy-making skills, but that's OK...it'll taste good enough, I'm sure.

Dessert will be apple and pumpkin pies. Some years we have a third pie, but that's only if there are more of us around the table. And some years we have even more items, like a soup, but I'm skipping that this year. I think this is enough, and I don't want leftovers for a week (although a few days without cooking is fine with me!).

It's funny, but most of these dishes are just gussied up versions of what we eat often, anyway. I think squashes are wonderful, easy side dishes all fall and winter, and so healthy if prepared simply. And poultry is a staple here.

But it's not about the food, really. We are all (relatively) healthy and that's reason enough to celebrate. Happy Thanksgiving!

Spinach and Brown Rice Casserole

My freezer is stuffed with bags of organic frozen spinach. I usually buy the Whole Foods house brand, but lots of supermarkets carry an organic version now. Regular spinach is pesticide-heavy, so I won't use it anymore. (Better late than never.) And the frozen, organic packages are so convenient.

You can toss spinach into soups or sauces, scrambled eggs, or just defrost and use as is. Bags are convenient because you can use just what you need, and put the rest back into the freezer. Frozen organic spinach has really become a staple in my kitchen and my go-to "convenience" vegetable when I'm running low on fresh items.

Here's a good recipe that uses spinach and rice together. I use it as a side dish, and consider it an easy way to sneak an "extra" vegetable into a meal. But it's certainly satisfying enough to be a vegetarian main dish. The original recipe comes from Cooking Down East which I mentioned here. Of course I had to modify it a bit, using brown rice instead of white rice, and grated Romano instead of (yuk) cheese whiz. I'm also loose with measurements...you really can't hurt a casserole.

Spinach and Brown Rice Casserole

1 16-oz package frozen spinach, thawed
2-3 cups cooked brown rice
1/4 cup finely chopped onion or shallot*
1/2 to 1 cup grated cheese*
2 tbsp. butter (optional)
salt and pepper to taste

Combine all ingredients in a 2-quart casserole dish. Bake uncovered at 350 for about 30 minutes, or until heated through.

If I have the time, I'll saute the onion or shallot in a little olive oil or butter. For the cheese, I'll use whatever I have on hand and that suits our taste. I've used Romano, Parmesan, and both regular and low-fat cheddar.

Leftovers are great for lunch the next day, too.

Saturday Random

It's been a quiet week here. Fall sports ended last week, so the older two are home right after school. It feels like we have a lot of free time suddenly. Of course, the upcoming holidays and various school events as well as winter sports will ramp up shortly. I don't stress *that* much about the holidays anymore. I really do try to take it as it comes, because I know control and planning are illusions. And, I really try not to think too far ahead. It's a useless exercise and just serves to make me anxious. (It was the only way I got through our medical dramas...a huge shift in how I function normally.)

The high school will be holding an H1N1 clinic the first week of December. I know the school nurse and volunteered to help with sign-in, etc. I'm aggravated, however, that the middle school does not have a flu clinic planned yet. This whole process has been flawed and disorganized from the beginning...starting at the national level.

The local paper had an article/commentary on Mom Guilt as it pertains to the H1N1 shot. On top of everything else mothers have to worry about, getting our kids the shot is becoming a competition. "Good" mothers have managed to get one, the rest of us are slackers. Funny, but I do understand the guilt thing. Maybe I should've parked myself and the kids outside the doctor's office at sunrise that day they offered the shot. Instead, I drove on by when I saw a couple of hundred people snaking out the door into the parking lot. What does that say about me?

And am I the only one annoyed at the incessant articles and early morning news show features describing low-calorie Thanksgiving menus? Um, it's once a year...if I want two servings of turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes with gravy, I'm going to have it. And, pass both the apple and pumpkin pies, please. One holiday is not going to make us overweight and unhealthy. Enjoy, and then move on.

Kale...and a Turkey Chili Recipe

Kale is one of those vegetables I never knew what to do with. I'd pass it by in the produce section of the grocery store in favor of spinach, swiss chard, broccoli rapini, and other familiar greens. Oh sure, it was pretty, but those sturdy leaves seemed more at home as a garnish than something you'd actually eat. (And ornamental kale is a popular fall plant around here, decorating late-season planters, along with colorful mums.)

In fact, kale is considered a form of cabbage, and is a good source of Vitamins C, A, and K, as well as calcium and omega-3 fatty acids. More importantly to me, however, the book Anticancer: A New Way of Life lists kale as one of the top vegetables that inhibit the growth of brain cancer cells. How could I not try to incorporate it into our meals?

So, in honor of kale and as a sort of pre-Thanksgiving preview, I'm making Turkey and Vegetable Chili Verde tonight. It's a much lighter, healthier version of chili and I think tastes really good. (My "regular" chili recipe uses chopped meat, sausage, and a bottle of beer. We won't go there.) This recipe uses 4 cups of chopped kale, but I add much more than that. You need a big pot, initially, to hold all the kale, but it cooks down very quickly--so you can get lots of this vegetable into the kids.

Dark turkey meat tastes better than white, but it's much fattier. Sometimes I'll use half of each. Also, I do saute the onions and garlic in some olive oil instead of the chicken broth. George Mateljan advocates against cooking with extra virgin olive oil, but I haven't investigated why yet. I don't think I want to know. How can all those Mediterranean countries be wrong?

Physicals...and H1N1 Again

Both boys had their yearly physicals in the past week. Both are "healthy," whatever that means. I confess to being cynical about yearly physicals for the kids. After the uber-specialists DD17 sees, it's hard to believe that listening to a heartbeat or looking in someone's ear is going to give you any information. Yeah, I know, there's more than meets the eye in a physical exam, but can they *really* tell if something is wrong? You have to present with a problem before the real probing begins, and then usually by a specialist.

We were told H1N1 vaccines were still not available, and they would not hold another flu clinic unless they have several hundred doses to distribute. I suspect, however, that they are maintaining a "high risk" list, and perhaps doling out the few vaccines that come in to those children. That's OK. Glad we're not on it, although the doctor did say that DS12 should not get the mist because of his intermittent asthma. So is he "medium risk?"

I asked one of the doctors what they consider high risk, and he said given the shortages, any child with chronic, severe asthma or with cystic fibrosis and on a ventilator.

After Hurricane Katrina, I maintained that we learned we could not depend on our government to take care of us during a major emergency. That's become obvious again with this H1N1 debacle. Stories of wealthy companies and sports teams receiving doses ahead of the general public (i.e., children) abound in the news. Town clinics have long lines of people, many from out of state. There certainly does not appear to be any organization in how these shots are distributed. Very frustrating, especially since we live near what I consider a "medical mecca."

Oh dear, this is becoming the H1N1 Whining Blog.

A Green Smoothie

I tried making green smoothies again. Success! I used the simplest recipe I've seen...two bananas, two cups of water, and a big handful or two of baby spinach leaves (enough to fill the blender). This made enough for about 3 or 4 glasses.

I was quite excited. I'm sure the kids think I'm a nut, but they indulged me by trying it. They agreed all you could taste was bananas, although they did make comments like "Looks like something Shrek would drink" and "I feel like I'm drinking pond scum."

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Hopefully green smoothies and the like will protect us against H1N1, because they're giving the virus away free at the local supermarket. Today, my cashier and the one behind me were trading stories about how they dragged themselves into work after three days home sick with aches, chills, and headaches. AARRGH. Now we know how pandemics happen.

Feeling Better

I had a good night's sleep after a two-day migraine, and feel like a million bucks. It's amazing what 7 hours of good rest does for my energy levels and my mental state. I try to encourage the older two to get to bed at a decent hour, but they have so much homework in addition to school activities and sports. (DS12 loves to sleep, so he's not an issue.) Since we've been unsuccessful trying to get the H1N1 shot so far, my approach has been more fruits and vegetables and more rest. It's all I can do to try to keep them healthy.

Yesterday I tried to make green smoothies for two of the kids. Green smoothies are all over the Internet and I confess to being intrigued by them...they are so green. Most recipes suggest fresh baby spinach leaves along with fruit, but I only had frozen spinach, frozen blueberries, and pears. The blueberries, unfortunately, turned the smoothie a muddy purple instead of the bright green I was hoping for. But the frozen spinach worked okay, after I let it thaw a bit. And you really couldn't taste the spinach, since it was masked by the sweetness of the fruit. I'll try making them again without blueberries, just because I think it's fun. (And while my kids will eat spinach now, they wouldn't when they were younger. I wonder if I could've gotten them to try a green smoothie back then. It would have been a great way to get healthy greens into them.)

Last night DS15's team won their game and will move on in the playoffs. I was not there, but husband reports that the fans--mostly parents--were a little out of control. I always find it interesting (and scary) how quickly parents can go over the top at a sporting event. I understand anger if your child gets hurt because of rough play and bad calls, but truly some parents set very bad examples. Uh, this is an upper middle-class community with educated people. You'd think they'd know better.

Feeding a Teenage Boy on the Go

We are a society on the go. Trying to eat healthy while away from home takes some thought and planning. Throw in picky appetites and other variables, and I don't think I'm always successful.

DS15 has an away-game tonight. They will be traveling about two hours each way (it's the playoffs) so he needed to pack food. The high school coach won't stop for fast food (thank goodness), but even if he did DS15 informed me he'd rather bring his own. So I sent him to school with a couple of soy-nut butter sandwiches and water bottles for the bus ride to the game...he won't have to worry about keeping them cold all day. And since my husband will go to the game, he's bringing a cooler with some roast beef subs and pumpkin muffins and will give them to DS15 after the game for the long ride home. I'd like to toss in some fruit too, but I didn't make it to the store in the last few days and we're running low on what DS15 likes.

I almost never buy deli anymore, because of the scary nitrates. However, when I'm desperate and need some sandwich fillings, I will get some high-quality deli roast beef. I figure roast beef has to have less preservatives than ham or turkey or bologna. Here in the Northeast, the brand Dietz and Watson claims to have less than 1% of ingredients I can't pronounce, at least in the roast beef (london broil). And considering I'll buy it maybe once every 3-4 months (if that), I figure it's OK.

I know Whole Foods carries nitrate-free deli, but it's not always convenient to get there and it's twice the price.

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I'm running low on fresh fruits and vegetables because I spent most of the last few days under a blanket on the couch. I had a killer migraine that I could not shake, despite prescription medicine. It really took me down and I was quite ineffective around here. Today it's 90% gone, but the aftereffects make me very tired and not on my game at all. I think the weather this weekend contributed, since the temperature spiked rapidly. For me, weather changes can cause a doozy of a migraine.

Really Good Really Easy Dinner Rolls

The other night I made dinner rolls. Homemade dinner rolls. (Pat self on back--I was so excited.) The recipe came from Taste of Home: Honey-Oat Pan Rolls.

I know my way around a kitchen and can and will try to cook anything, but my dinner rolls have always been a disaster. I can make a decent loaf of bread and a good pizza crust, but something about turning dough into rolls has eluded me for years. They're either too hard or too doughy or look unappetizing. They almost always taste okay, if you love bread-y foods, but they never come close to store-bought brown-'n-serve style rolls.

One of the curses of becoming a label reader is realizing all the extra, unhealthy ingredients (like high fructose corn syrup) in simple bread products. (I wrote about trying to buy a healthier loaf of bread here.) I understand some ingredients keep items shelf-stable, but I worry about what all those preservatives are doing to our bodies. Enter home-made bread and rolls, at least occasionally.

The rolls even looked good. I forgot to brush them with melted butter, but we didn't even miss it. Not too sweet and with the addition of whole-wheat flour, these are definitely healthier than store-bought. You could probably even tweak them a bit with healthy additions like flaxseed, or try other grains like rye flour. I used my Kitchen Aid mixer with the dough hook, because I was rushing and didn't have the time or space to knead, so they were really easy to make.

I will definitely make these again.

Thursday Musings

This week has been dragging along. Maybe it's the time change, but we're all so tired. DS12 went to bed at 8:15 last night, and still had to be awakened at 6:15 a.m. today. I'm still adjusting to the darkness at 4:45 every afternoon...it feels like a surprise every day when I look outside and notice it.

This H1N1 vaccine shortage has been so frustrating. The kids and teachers at both schools are dropping like flies, but the numbers haven't reached a critical point yet. It seems as if they ebb and flow so that people are sick at different times. DD17 is amazed she hasn't caught the flu yet, since everyone around her is coughing. One teacher ordered a coughing student out of her classroom and sent her to the nurse, despite the student's objections. Very frustrating for everyone.

Our town had a Halloween candy "give back" day, where the kids were encouraged to give up some Halloween candy that would then be sent to the troops overseas. We sorted out at least half of the candy and dropped it off, with no arguments. Even DS12 agreed it was best to cut back on the candy and up the healthy snacks, given all the germs around. I generally let the kids eat as much candy as they want, since the gluttony usually lasts about a week only, but this year they finally seem to "get it." DD17 really hasn't eaten much candy at all since she was diagnosed with her nut allergy (although we do treat her occasionally to an order from Vermont Nut Free chocolate). And DS15 gets the connection between athletic performance and what he puts in his body, and he's had success in the sports he plays so he figures he's doing something right, nutritionally.

And I do remember when growing up there were always some kids around who weren't ever allowed candy or soda or cookies. They seemed to be the ones who used their lunch money to buy junk instead of lunch at school. And while I know the junk is everywhere today, and the kids (at least in elementary school) have so many occasions in school for candy/parties/etc. (which used to drive me crazy), I think banning everything doesn't teach a child to make good decisions. They have to understand the connection between what they put in their mouths and the effect it may have on their body or even their moods. Because eventually, they will be exposed to situations where they have to make the choice of what to eat or not eat. Arming a child with the knowledge of what to choose and when is infinitely better, I think, than never having exposed them to that choice at all.

Spaghetti Squash

Spaghetti squash is a fun vegetable to serve my family. Full of nutrients and low-cal to boot, it's a great way to get more vegetables into the kids. Tossed with tomato sauce and grated cheese, it really does look like spaghetti.

To cook, split a washed squash in half lengthwise. Place halves skin side down in baking pan. Add an inch of water to pan and then cover tightly with tin foil. Bake in 350 degree oven for about an hour, or until strands separate easily with a fork.

Allow to cool until easy to handle. Remove seeds and then with a fork, scoop out the flesh. It will separate easily into spaghetti-like strands.

We like it served simply with a light tomato sauce, but I recently tried this recipe which we liked, too. You can also toss it with a heartier meat sauce, making it the centerpiece of the meal.

H1N1 Vaccine Frustration...and Saturday Random

Yesterday's flu hotline at the pediatrician's office said there would be a limited amount of H1N1 injectable vaccine distributed today from 10:00 a.m. until 1:00 p.m. I looked at our schedule and realized we could swing it--the kids could skip two activities for this. So I piled everyone in the car around 9:30 a.m. and made the 10 minute trek to the doctor's office in hopes of being first in line.

Silly me. We couldn't even get into the parking lot. The line of people stretched from the door all around the lot...I couldn't even see the end. I can't even begin to imagine what time the line started forming. I just know I don't have it in me to wait for several hours without any guarantee of getting a shot. So we drove on by.

I'm guessing the hysteria is fueled by the news yesterday that a local school (not ours) was shutting down all next week because of extreme absenteeism due to flu-like symptoms. Really, I don't know who to believe any more....the news about all the parents against the vaccine, or the news about such extreme shortage that even healthy adults are snagging shots when they can ("cheater" stories are starting to make news). I *may* call at the tail end of the clinic and see if by chance there's anything left, but I highly doubt it.

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The weekend schedule involves lots of outdoor activities, and the weather should cooperate. The change back to standard time tomorrow makes daylight all the more precious, so I'm happy to have us all out and about when we can. It'll be dark tomorrow by 4:30, which is depressing. The flip side is that it will be light at 6:45 a.m. when the older kids catch the bus, thank goodness.

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I'm wondering if my community is in some kind of time warp when it comes to Halloween. I don't really remember trick or treating past a certain age (maybe 13 or so). But here, even the older teenagers go out, usually in costume. On one hand, I'm glad they're not too cool to consider it and that, contrary to popular belief, kids aren't growing up too fast (at least in this regard) but on the other hand, it's a little creepy when a pack of tall kids with facial hair comes to the door. Regardless, they are always polite.

Bothering the Hospital

My father suggested getting DD17 her H1N1 shot from "her hospital" (that's how we think of it). I didn't really consider that idea before, but I'm not sure I'd even try. First of all, I don't even know if they have the vaccine. It sounds as if even health care workers are having a hard time getting it. Second, I'm sure first priority would go to "current" patients as opposed to those "off-treatment." Although, children going through chemotherapy often don't get any benefit from flu shots, depending on their blood counts. The higher the white blood cell count, the more effective the shot. Treatment year was when the rest of us started getting flu shots...to keep DD17 flu-free, if possible (it worked).

Calling to ask about a flu shot feels like "bothering" the hospital.

I know how busy pediatric hematology-oncology clinics are. A subtle hierarchy emerges in the cancer journey. When a child is first diagnosed in a major teaching hospital, everyone drops everything for you. You move to the front of the line. MRIs are instantaneous, surgery is immediate.

Later, in the throes of treatment, you are still priority. Appointments are vaguely defined and your phone calls are taken immediately. But once you segue to the "off-treatment" phase, the regular doctor/hospital hassles emerge. There's more sitting around in waiting rooms, and appointments are not always convenient.

But that's OK. We're glad to wait. Please focus on the sick children. Been there, done that. We'll be patient and happy it's not an emergency. So, no I wouldn't call the hospital and ask for a flu shot unless absolutely necessary. We'll wait in line like everyone else, and be thankful we can.

Waiting for the Shot

Daily calls to the pediatrician's flu hotline haven't yielded any new information, nor any H1N1 shots. It looks like last week's vaccine shipment was all they'll get this month (which is almost over). At this point, I'm hoping the schools get the vaccine first. I don't think I can face another flu clinic with all the surrounding hysteria. What ever happened to the sizable percentage of people who don't trust the vaccine and won't get it for their kids? Now it seems everyone wants one, but perhaps we're just being played by the media and that's the group that's getting the air time. Or, as one television commentator put it, there's nothing like a shortage to cause demand.

Meanwhile, the number of absent students in local schools continues to rise. DS12 tells me that he heard from a teacher that once a certain number is reached, his school will close, and they are almost at that number. But I'm not convinced it's just H1N1...DS12 had an upper respiratory virus this past week, so that's going around too.

He's better, but I think he may be cooking a sinus infection. At the advice of his doctor, I will keep him on Flovent for two weeks, or even longer, at least until he can get the shot. I'm certainly no asthma expert since his is so sporadic and just diagnosed two years ago, but I do feel it's better to keep his lungs as clear as possible during this time.

Salmon Chowder

Salmon Chowder is an easy way to get some fish into the kids. I use a recipe from Cooking Down East by Marjorie Standish, which is a regional cookbook focusing on Maine cooking. Well, maybe mid-century Maine cooking...there are some unfortunate recipes using gelatin, Velveeta, and Campbell's soup. But there lots of simple, easily adaptable recipes too.

I've made some minor adjustments to hopefully make it healthier, maybe sacrificing authenticity in the process. Either way, it's very good.

Salmon Chowder

1 slice turkey bacon*
1 tbsp. canola oil*
3 or 4 slices onion, diced
3 cups diced potatoes
1 cup water
1 14.75 oz. can Alaska sockeye red salmon*
1 quart low-fat milk
pat of butter
salt and pepper to taste

Dice turkey bacon and fry in oil in stockpot. Remove bacon. Saute onion in oil until golden. Add potatoes and water. Cover and bring to steaming point. Cook on low heat about 15 minutes or until potato is tender. Break up canned salmon and add to pot. Stir lightly, add milk and pat of butter. Heat slowly but do not allow to boil. Remove from heat.

This tastes better the longer it ages. I try to make it earlier in the day, or even the day before, then re-heating and serving.

*The original recipe uses salt pork and/or butter. I never have salt pork on hand, so I rarely use it. The author also suggests using pink salmon, as it's cheaper and just as tasty, but I want the omega-3s from the sockeye salmon. Also, typically the bones and skin are removed from the salmon before using in a chowder, but I keep them in. The bones are a good source of calcium and very soft. I don't mind the skin, but it might not look appealing to some. Finally, I almost never use whole milk, but I'm sure the recipe was not intended for low-fat milk.

Canned salmon is so versatile. I'd love some other ways to use it, in addition to the salmon burgers we like.

Upgrading our Meat

Motherhood has made me very skittish about food safety. There are so many things to worry about, and the food supply system in the U.S. lets us down every so often. Vigilance is needed on two fronts...in the store and in the kitchen. Having a child with a compromised immune system ratcheted up the vigilance, which persists several years later.

For example, buying meat used to be so easy. I didn't think about it too much. However, mandatory country of origin labeling (COOL) laws went into effect within the last year in several states, and that means all fresh meat products must be labeled. And there are some weird labels out there.

Some packages of meat in my local supermarket have the country of origin as "U.S., Canada, and Mexico." Do I assume that means the ground beef is from several countries, all mixed up together? Yuck. I've read enough about factory farms to be sufficiently grossed-out by that label.

Even cuts of roast beef say something similar. What exactly does that mean? Aren't they sure where that side of cow came from?

Luckily, there are other choices, even in a typical chain supermarket around here.

So, over the last several months, I've slowly made the choice to upgrade most meat purchases to the more expensive, hormone-free, antibiotic-free, ranch-raised U.S. meat, readily available (albeit in smaller quantities) in the meat case. And while I haven't made the jump to local meat (it might devastate our budget), we eat less meat overall now so this compromise works for us.

Most Europeans live this way. Meat is a small part of the meal, not the star, because it's very expensive. Also, Europeans allocate a much bigger percentage of their income to food, compared to Americans, who've come to expect great quantities of cheap food. And while we all can't live like Europeans, with their small shops devoted to breads or cheeses or fish, we can apply some of their strategies to our own lifestyles. Maybe we'll be healthier for it, in the long run. And our children will come to savor a smaller piece of a succulent steak, instead of a Whopper with large fries.

Golden Autumn Soup...and Saturday Flu Update

Last week I was checking out the contents of my fridge and decided to make a vegetable soup based on what I had on hand. This versatile soup was such a big hit that I've made it three times already. The ingredients are flexible and can be adapted to many tastes. The sweet potatoes thicken the broth and the spinach adds that nice green contrast, plus more vitamins.

Golden Autumn Soup

1 onion, roughly chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 stalks celery, chopped
1/4 cup olive oil
2 tomatoes, chopped (or 1-14 oz. can diced tomatoes)
1 butternut squash, peeled and chopped
1 sweet potato, peeled and chopped
chopped fresh spinach, or frozen spinach*
2 cups chicken or vegetable stock
2 cups water
salt and pepper to taste

In a stockpot, heat the olive oil. Saute the onion, garlic, and celery in olive oil until vegetables are softened and onion is translucent. Add the remaining ingredients and bring to a boil. Lower heat and simmer for about 45 minutes, or until vegetables are softened. Serve with grated cheese.

*I keep bags of organic frozen spinach in my freezer. They make an easy, nutritious addition to most soups. I don't even thaw before adding, and amounts depend on your taste. You could use any green leafy vegetable like swiss chard or escarole.

If you grate your own Parmesan or Romano cheese, save the rinds in a bag in your fridge. When you make soup or tomato sauce, add a rind and let simmer with the other ingredients. It adds a depth of flavor advocated by both Cook's magazine and my mother.

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DS12 woke up this morning with a slight cough and wheezing. He develops asthma every 4th cold or so, which translates to roughly once or twice a year, so I wasn't worried except he seemed slightly warm. My thermometer is broken, so I made an appointment to bring him into the pediatrician's this morning. He had told me that 100 students were out sick with flu-like symptoms yesterday at his school.

He was given a mask at the office, as were other children in the waiting room. It was not crowded, as it was limited Saturday hours. He tested negative for the flu (although the quick test is only 30-90% accurate, according to the pediatrician). He did not have a fever, and she suspects it's just the remnants of the cold earlier this week. We will start using the inhalers for a while, in hopes of clearing out his lungs and getting them healthy enough to withstand the flu that has arrived in our state and town.

A friend did go to our pediatrician's H1N1 flu clinic this week, and the office did run out of shots before her child could get one. Guess it was good I didn't bother. Although I am slightly worried about our exposure to the flu sitting in the doctor's office...you just can't win.

Pumpkin Chip Muffins

Since I rarely buy packaged cookies anymore, there's a lack of sweets in my house unless I make them myself. Lately I've become a big fan of homemade muffins. They're easier and quicker than baking cookies. You can create infinite varieties by tweaking a basic recipe, and by making a few substitutions, make them healthier to boot.

It feels like Autumn here, and we've had a freeze, so I decided to make pumpkin muffins to mark the season. I used a recipe I found online and made several substitutions to suit our tastes and hopefully up the wholesomeness.

Pumpkin Chip Muffins

1 cup whole wheat flour
2/3 cup unbleached white flour
1/2 to 1 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 to 1 tsp. nutmeg
1/2 to 1 tsp. cloves
1 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. salt
1/3 cup honey
2 large eggs
1 cup plain pumpkin (I used canned)
1/2 cup canola oil
1 cup dark chocolate chips
(optional: 4 tbsp. ground flaxseed)

Mix dry ingredients in large bowl. In another bowl, blend honey, eggs, pumpkin, and oil. Pour wet ingredients into dry ingredients and fold just until moistened. Fold in chocolate chips. Fill greased muffin cups 2/3 full. Bake at 350 for 20 to 25 minutes or until puffed and springy to touch. Remove to wire racks to cool.

They were quite good, not too sweet, and went quickly. (Like most "quick" bread-type recipes, they'd probably taste even better the next day, if you can wait that long.) Whole wheat makes a denser muffin, but also a more filling one. Next time I might try raisins instead of chocolate chips, and I'm sure the addition of chopped walnuts would be delicious (but we're nut-free here).

H1N1 Clinic Update

We didn't go after all. I called and spoke to a triage nurse about DS12. The nurse thought he shouldn't get a flu shot with a sore throat. And the older two kids had activities/practices late. They didn't want to go sit in a clinic without a guarantee they'd get a shot. The nurse did say she thought it would be packed.

The evening news, coincidentally, did a piece on H1N1 vaccine shortages everywhere. Production is lagging and states are having to put off flu clinics. Hopefully we didn't miss the boat by skipping the clinic. Well, sometimes these things work out for the best. Maybe I don't want my kids to be first in line for a shot, just in case.

DS12, however, is feeling great today and went off to school. That was a quick cold, thank goodness.

H1N1 Clinic

Our pediatrician will be holding an H1N1 clinic tomorrow night. The recorded message said there was limited injectable vaccine but plenty of flu-mist vaccine. First come first serve. I might try running the kids over, but DS12 came home from school today with a sore throat. I'll have to see how he feels in the morning. I'll probably call the pediatrician to ask if a cold (likely) with no fever is a reason to not get the vaccine.

Of course, the thought has crossed my mind that he might have H1N1, and the sore throat is the start. We'll see. He's known in our house as "the carrier."

Here's another article advocating the shot. I like these. They counteract the hysterical, anti-vaccine crowd. I'm 99% certain the vaccine is a Good Thing. We don't like illness in this house, and I'd rather "risk" the vaccine than risk getting H1N1, especially with one kid with asthma. And DD17 has not been very "sick" at all for the last five years, believe it or not.

LibraryThing

I joined LibraryThing, mostly because it had a cool widget (now in the sidebar), but also because I think it's an interesting idea. I'm not sure how I'll use it exactly, yet. I doubt I'd list every book I own or every book I read. (Some are clunkers and since I'm a big library user, I just return them without guilt...even if I haven't finished reading.) Some of my books are stored away in boxes, others I donate to the annual library book sale, if I feel "done" with them (like baby rearing books.)

I checked out Shelfari and goodreads, too. I liked the Shelfari widget the best, but it comes with Google ads, which I dislike in blogs. And goodreads didn't do anything for me. Both are more social networking sites, too...virtual book clubs if that's your thing.

LibraryThing can be configured in different ways, so if I just want to display certain categories of books (health-related, for example), I think I can do that. So blog readers don't have to know I have quite a collection of old Nancy Drews if I don't want them to :-)

LibraryThing has one negative, however. After cataloging 200 books, you are charged a one-time fee of $25.00 for additional books. Still, I think it's a more "professional" cataloging site than the others, so I'm sure that $25.00 is worth it for the full functionality available for those who will use it.

Book Review: Refined to Real Food

I saw this book in the library a few weeks ago, and decided to read it. Refined to Real Food: Moving Your Family Toward Healthier, Wholesome Eating by Allison Anneser describes a systematic approach to cutting out the junk in our diets and progressing towards a healthier way of eating. She talks about "shifting" to more nutritious foods in a gradual way. By making small changes slowly, you move from processed to real food in a way that your family will accept. If they've been used to take-out and twinkies, switching to home cooked meals and fresh fruit takes some adjusting.

From vegetables and fruits to grains and meats, she describes and encourages small substitutions in incremental ways. For example, shifting to whole grains might involve substituting brown rice for white rice. Then swap whole grain flour for white flour. Later, you might try quinoa or buckwheat. If your kids like cereal for breakfast, try oatmeal. Later, switch to steel-cut oats and add your own sweetener, like honey.

For meats, a shifting strategy might include starting with naturally-raised, antibiotic-free chickens (not sure if Perdue birds fall into this category), then shift to cage-free, organically fed birds, and finally moving towards a local source of pasture-fed poultry, if possible.

She suggests ideas and strategies that encourage meal planning so that most of our meals will be home cooked. A lot of it is common sense and organization, but I suppose a lot of us just don't do this. Freezing leftovers or cooking twice as much for another meal seems obvious to me, but maybe I'm just used to bulk cooking with teenagers.

I liked the attitude of this book. Anneser recognizes that suddenly revamping our food lifestyles, especially with families, can be difficult and extreme. Her "shifting" premise gives us permission to make changes slowly and flexibly. She is not dogmatic in her approach and recognizes that it doesn't have to be an "all-or-nothing" lifestyle change. For some of us, cleaning out the cupboard in one fell swoop wouldn't work for our families. She gives us permission to make the changes that work for us, when and how we can. For me, it was a guilt-free read on the road to better nutrition.

H1N1 Questions and Answers

Here's a link to an article addressing concerns about the H1N1 vaccine. It's probably the best one I've found online so far:

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/10/health/10primer.html?_r=1

I'll probably call the pediatrician today to see if they have any shots in yet. I don't think I want to wait until the schools' November flu clinics to get the kids inoculated if I can help it. Every time someone coughs around me (uh, like my hairdresser yesterday) I get nervous. Really, if you've spent any time in ICU with a seriously ill child, you do not want to go back.

Better School Lunches

News reports today announced that lawmakers in our state are considering legislation that will make school lunches healthier, in an effort to combat childhood obesity. One bill would require schools to limit trans fat and saturated fat in school lunches. Another bill would make weekly nutrition classes mandatory for students. Highly controversial BMI screenings by the school nurse are already in effect here.

Over the years, I've seen the school lunches here become somewhat healthier, if only by degrees. Although I am not well-versed in the details (nor can I find anything online as to the vendors providing the food), my observations are that the choices are more varied, the junk food is limited, and better choices are encouraged.

For example, the elementary schools used to offer a hot dog and chips one day a week when my older two attended. Now a hot dog is offered once a month only. Fries are oven-baked. A bowl of fruit is always available, along with cheese cubes, to supplement both school food and packed lunches--this is free. Stir-fries are offered, with rice. We're moving in the right direction, albeit slowly. The cafeteria director sends home a kid-friendly newsletter once a month, with nutrition information and ideas for healthier snacks. A local pizza chain provides pizza a few times a month, however.

Things get better in the middle and high schools. There are wrap stations (with vegetables) every day, along with paninis and soups. DD17 reports that the taco bar is very popular, however, with most kids skipping the veggie additions and just adding cheese and nacho chips to the greasy meat. Hmm.

She brings her lunch most days, feeling that although there are salads and fruits available, the freshness is questionable. And were the apples washed? Well, she's coming from a different perspective than most kids. When you've experienced a time in your life where low-blood counts make unwashed raw fruit dangerous, you look at food differently.

I look forward to the push for healthier school food. A lot of kids (like DS15) can't be bothered bringing a lunch box to school, along with some 30 lbs. of books (I've weighed his backpack) plus sports gear plus an instrument. For them, the convenience of a hot lunch is important. (He's a fan of the wrap station, assuring me he gets chicken with veggies most days. I mostly believe him.)

I remember a piece on 60 Minutes a few years ago that profiled an "alternative" high school for troubled teens who'd been kicked out of their previous schools. This "alternative" school had an arrangement with a local organic farm to provide most of the school food for these kids. The turnaround in behavior was astounding. Switching from highly processed junk food and sodas and fast food to healthy meals effected an amazing change in these kids. Discipline issues were severely curtailed and the kids became much better students. I've tried to find this piece online but haven't been successful. It was very, very interesting.

Check out this website for more information on the push for healthier school foods: http://blog.betterschoolfood.org/. In this era of belt-tightening and school lunch services that are essentially the low-bidders for our children's health, it's important to recognize that short-changing our kids' nutrition will cost us more in the long run.

Spinach Mashed Potatoes

It was crazy-busy this past week. All three kids had games or activities like music lessons almost every night. We did manage to eat dinner together most nights, however. We just have to be flexible about the time we eat. Thankfully, husband works from home quite often so flexibility is easy for us. I just have to think through the menu options...I can't do last minute and healthy at the same time.

It's almost time to bring out the crockpot. For me it's a colder weather item...everything tastes sort of stewed in it. Maybe I just need better recipes or technique. But there's no denying it's a time-saver...if I'm organized I can even get everything into the pot the night before, refrigerate it, and then start it up in the morning. Even though I'm a stay-at-home mom right now, the reality of our lives is that we're in the car more than we're at home. Big, involved meals just don't happen during the week.

A while ago I read an article about a mom who blended veggies into mashed potatoes in an effort to get her kids to eat more vegetables. I was intrigued especially by her recipe for mashed potatoes with spinach. She used baby spinach leaves but I usually have several bags of frozen spinach in my freezer, so I used that instead. I added the spinach at the end of the cooking time for the potatoes, letting it boil for just a few minutes.

I was really pleased with the results. It was creamy and pretty and certainly upped the nutrition of mashed potatoes with butter. The spinach didn't dominate the taste of the potatoes, either, so picky eaters might like this dish. Imagine how pretty carrots might look instead of spinach.

Jealous of Pink

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. If you live in the United States, you can't miss it. Pink ribbons are on everything. Pro football players are wearing pink on their jerseys. Our local newspaper is tinted pink this month.

I'm jealous.

I wonder how many people know that September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. Or that a gold ribbon is the symbol for the disease. I certainly didn't, until my child was diagnosed with cancer. Why not? Probably because childhood cancer is relatively rare. Maybe because it makes us all very uncomfortable, because it's so tragic. Maybe we'd rather not think about it. I know I wouldn't.

Childhood cancer research is severely underfunded. When I see pink ribbons everywhere, I'm saddened by the fact that children have no voice to secure much-needed research dollars. Their parents have to do it for them, and during the ordeal, most of us are just too tired and trying to survive emotionally. Afterward, some parents just want to forget that chapter in their lives and move on.

Some of us will write letters to Congress and checks to our local hospital. We'll participate in walks and fundraisers. But it feels a little bit like having a bake sale...you just can't make that much money this way. Not the kind of money that propels research forward.

I know many people who've had breast cancer. Several relatives have battled it. I am saddened by their ordeals, and admire their strength. Odds are I'll have to deal with it at some point, too. What woman hasn't emerged from a mammogram and thought, "Not my turn yet."

But I know that nothing that can compare to having your own child diagnosed with cancer.

Check out CureSearch for information on childhood cancer, important research, and the drive to secure more dollars from Congress.

Wear the pink, but remember the gold, too.

Random Sunday Thoughts...and Shiitake Mushroom Soup

It poured all day yesterday, so it would seem as if today could be sunny. Nope. With the waning daylight on both ends, it's getting me down to spend so much time in the low light. And this persistent headache that segues in and out of migraine mode every other day is probably caused by the mold and ragweed allergens, high this time of year around here.

DD17 said her head hurt this morning. That gives me pause, always, but I do think today it's probably the same gunk in the air causing her headache that's causing mine.

I worked a bit on the Heather Hoodie Vest yesterday, but in my enthusiasm to move it along I bound off the back too soon. After eyeing the length dubiously, I compared it to an existing sweater and decided it was going to be too short. So I unbound the edges and put the stitches back on the needles. Two steps forward, one step back. That kind of day.

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One of my few exposures to mushrooms as a child was a stuffed mushroom dish at the holidays. Filled with sausage meat and cheese and egg as a binder, it was tasty but really heavy. And I'm pretty sure all that sausage negated any health benefits from the mushrooms.

Now that I'm an adult, I'm hampered by experimenting with mushrooms since my husband dislikes them. He traces his dislike to childhood trauma involving visits to an aunt who would take all the children mushroom foraging. Then they would return home and she would start cooking all the mushrooms. The smell of the cooking mushrooms scarred him for life, I think.

So, when I started reading about the health benefits of shiitake mushrooms, I was determined to try to include some in our diet (well, husband excludes himself). Unlike more conventional western produce, I'm unsure how to select shiitake mushrooms. Are they fresh? Does organic matter? How do you clean these things? So I cheat and do the American thing: buy frozen. The local supermarkets all carry frozen organic mushrooms, and while it's probably not the same as fresh, it seems good enough for my purposes.

So far, I've used them in fairly easy ways: adding to tomato sauce or in a quick saute. But this week's blog post from Dr. Andrew Weil (another interesting health website) included a recipe for Mushroom Stock using dried shiitake mushrooms. I just had to try it.

You start with dried shiitake mushrooms, which I found easily in the supermarket. I added leeks instead of onions, and left out the fennel which I don't particularly like. I used a low-sodium soy sauce instead of the tamari (which is just a soy sauce, if the label is correct) because I keep soy sauce in the house. Simmer for 1.5 hours and strain.

To make the soup, I reheated the broth later and added some frozen shiitake mushrooms and some orzo because that's what I had on hand. I suppose you could add some green onion or other light vegetable for color and flavor. I'll have to experiment.

We liked this. It was strongly flavored, but interesting. Even DS12 liked it, and he's the picky one. Husband, alas, abstained.

October is...

....sweater weather! I'm making DD17 the Heather Hoodie Vest from the Fall 2009 issue of Knitscene.

It's a fast knit and I'm almost finished with the back, which is the biggest piece. I need to keep plugging away with this, so she can wear it soon and I can move on to another project. It's supposed to rain this weekend, so hopefully I'll make some progress on it.

I'm really liking this yarn. The yarn store owner recommended it instead of the Brown Sheep Lamb's Pride Bulky originally called for. She says it won't pill as much. I just like the tweedy flecks since it's more interesting, I think. It's more of a bright navy blue than the cobalt blue that's showing up in these shots.

The yarn is Lana Grossa Royal Tweed, and it's so soft. Hopefully it well wear well, because I'm sure it will be washed often. DD17 tends to toss all her clothes in the hamper after school...all that sneezing and coughing in the halls really grosses her out. Can't say I blame her, but wool sweaters need a little TLC to stay nice looking.

A Shower of Books

A family friend is adopting a child from Kazakhstan. A relative is throwing her a shower and requesting books for gifts. I think this is a wonderful idea, and so useful for an older couple who can afford to buy anything the child will need. Having an established library will hopefully encourage a love of reading, as well as help the child learn English. I've written about my kids' own collection of books here, and feel that instilling a love of reading is one of the best gifts you can give a child.

I asked the kids to choose a favorite book from early childhood, and then inscribe the book with a welcome note for the child. Yesterday I went to the bookstore and bought their choices. DD17 picked Corduroy (because she still has her favorite Teddy Bear), DS15 picked Where the Wild Things Are (described him perfectly when he was little), and DS12 picked Curious George (ditto!).

We can't make the shower, but I mailed off the books today.

Beets and The World's Healthiest Foods

My weekly e-newsletter from the The World's Healthiest Foods (a great website!) includes an article about beets. Coincidentally, I had a couple in my refrigerator and sort of forgot to use them this past weekend. So tonight I think I will peel, chop and roast them with some potatoes as a side dish to roast chicken. I love when inspiration strikes...it takes the drudgery out of cooking.

As a child, I probably had beets from a can. They are much better fresh. We like them roasted and caramelized with onions and olive oil, but I admit I haven't tried them many other ways yet. Their red color can be a little shocking to kids, but that just adds interest to the meal.

George Mateljan's website is an incredible source of information. I've even emailed them to ask specific questions and they've always responded...sort of like having your own personal nutritionist. Of course, he has a slant towards natural, whole foods prepared certain ways. But I believe knowledge is power, and it's always interesting to hear other points of view. For example, he doesn't cook with olive oil but I don't think he'd ever convince me to give that up.

Pesto

Tonight I made pesto. I haven't made it in years, probably because the kids didn't like it at one time. But yesterday I was flipping through my collection of Taste of Home cookbooks, and saw the recipe for Basil Parsley Pesto. My mother has been offering me parsley from her garden all summer, and I hardly ever use it. So I was inspired by the recipe, my mother's parsley, and my soon-to-freeze basil to try pesto again.

Here's the recipe from the 2001 issue of Taste of Home:

1 cup tightly packed fresh basil leaves
1 cup tightly packed fresh parsley leaves
1 to 2 gloves of garlic
1/2 cup olive oil
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
1/4 teaspoon salt

Combine all ingredients in a food processor; cover and puree until smooth. Toss with hot cooked pasta.

It was delicious. The kids loved it. It was spicy and peppery and pungent. And so very green. I wish I had thought to try it sooner. It fits in so well with my "eat your colors" mantra.

The recipe did not call for any pine nuts or walnuts, which I wouldn't have used anyway because of DD17's nut allergy. But it was wonderful just the same.

Simple Butternut Squash

Today I stopped by our local farm to pick up some apples and assorted vegetables. Unless I'm desperate, I can't bring myself to purchase in a supermarket what I can buy at a farm this time of year. Yes, sometimes it's inconvenient to shop for groceries at one place and then vegetables at another place. But I know I'm doing my small part in encouraging our family farms to keep on going. And of course the produce is more nutritious and fresher if just picked.

At the farm, an older woman saw me picking out some butternut squash and asked me how I prepare it. I was a little surprised, because I tend to think everyone else around me is the expert and I'm just a poseur. But maybe cooking isn't her thing, and she isn't Internet-savvy enough to google butternut squash.

So I told her how I make butternut squash: On a sturdy cutting board, split the squash in half length-wise. Scoop out the seeds and place both halves cut-side up in a roasting pan. Add about an inch of water to the pan and cover tightly with tin foil. Bake in the oven at 350 for at least an hour, depending on the size of the squash. Remove foil carefully, allowing steam to escape. Scoop out the tender flesh and season with salt and pepper. You can add butter or a little sweetener like brown sugar or maple syrup, but I like it plain.

I love squash, but it takes some convincing for DS12 to eat it. I try to reason with him, and tell him that no, it doesn't taste like a brownie, it tastes like a squash (that makes him laugh). Once a child adjusts his expectations and accepts a vegetable for what it is, he may even come to appreciate it. Sometimes it seems like a never-ending process, but I see the results in my older two. You just can't give up.

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My blog has a Follower, other than my husband. I'm not even sure what that means (I haven't investigated all the Blogger features yet), but I'm glad to know someone else out there has seen my blog besides Filljonk. Dr. Susan Rubin has some very interesting blogs, and I look forward to reading them.

Moods

This morning DD17 said she felt depressed and didn't know why. She has always been a cheerful child, with only the very occasional bad mood. I'm hyper-aware of her moods, worrying about depression after what she went through, but for the most part, she bounces back quickly from the blues. I know sometimes "stuff" is buried deep inside, and I've been warned by well-meaning relatives how it might all erupt at some point in the future. I've read of kids years later developing all kinds of problems, but I think that's true of all of us after any kind of trauma. So far, so good. I like to think we did our best to normalize our lives as much as possible, shelving the hard times and challenges and only taking them out when we had to...trying not to let them spill out into other parts of our lives. And January's surgery seems a minor blip on our radar screen in the grand scheme of things.

So this morning I told her to accept her mood today, just go with it. It's best, I think, not to fight the occasional bad or sad mood. I have a newspaper clipping on my refrigerator that speaks of happiness, and tries to define it in relation to our other moods. Some of the pertinent points:

• Accepting emotions (such as fear, sadness, etc.) as natural makes us more likely to shake them off eventually. Rejecting or fighting against them is often useless and leads to frustration.
• Gratitude for what we do have as opposed to listing all that is wrong with our lives leads to peacefulness.
• Your mind can't feel good if your body feels ill. You can influence your mood by adequate rest, healthy food, and regular exercise.
  

I suspect part of DD17 down mood today is that she's tired from the onslaught of 12th grade schoolwork, as well as school schedule problems that's left her feeling in limbo for too long the last few weeks. And she has The September Cold. (I emailed her the Well blog post from yesterday, since she has not been getting enough sleep. She rolled her eyes.)

Mixed Messages on the H1N1 Flu

A neighbor's pediatrician told her she would not recommend the H1N1 flu shot to her patients. I find this very confusing, as my pediatrician does recommend them and will even give them to her own children. I wish everyone was on the same page because it would make these decisions easier. I haven't heard of any adverse reactions to the vaccine in trials, but who knows what may crop up when many, many schoolchildren are inoculated.

It may be a moot point around here, as DD17 said a classmate has been confirmed to have the H1N1 flu. Supposedly she *was* tested for it, and has been out of school ever since. She is an athlete and I suspect if it was going to spread, it would spread to her team first. We'll see what happens next. I keep reminding myself that for most people, it's just the flu, as uncomfortable as that is. For most people, it will not be a life-threatening illness. I need to get back to that place where I just accept what comes, because control is always an illusion.

Random Saturday Thoughts

It's beautiful out today, just a perfect September day. This morning was cold! DS15 ran a road race, and I wished I'd brought my puffer coat, but that seemed silly for so early in the season. Later this afternoon it was more seasonable, and I was almost too warm sitting in the sun at DS12's soccer game. There's even a chance of a frost tonight. I might cover my basil plant because it will get warmer next week. Though I do mourn the end of our short growing season, I won't cover all the flowers. It's too much work. Hopefully they'll survive.

DD17 got her flu shot today. She has a cold (the September Cold) but the nurse said she could still get her shot as long as she wasn't running a fever (she wasn't). I'm just glad to get this round of shots over with. Now we wait for the H1N1 version. Like last week, the clinic was packed. I really don't remember flu clinics being so busy the last few years. I think everyone is just really nervous. A neighbor went to a local pharmacy for her shot, and they told her they thought they might run out soon, they were so busy.

DD17 heard second-hand that a classmate has the H1N1 flu, but I doubt it. If they are no longer testing for this strain, how can anyone be sure they have it, unless they end up in the hospital? I think we'll all wonder if that's what we have the first time we get a fever this season. After all, it can be a mild illness for some people. Who knows, maybe one of us already had it last Spring. DS12 did run a fever and felt very crummy for a few days last April. I did wonder at the time.

On the other hand, the paper this week said several local colleges have anywhere from 60-100 cases of H1N1 each, so I suppose it's possible that it's spreading out to the surrounding communities. Students are either being sent home if they live within X number of miles of the college, or isolated in "flu dorms." I'm just glad we're a year away from worrying about that with DD17.

Yesterday I succumbed to the whining about all the meatless meals this week, and purchased a boneless lamb roast. (The cooler weather had me craving some meat, too.) I used Julia Child's mustard coating from The Way to Cook to cover the lamb before roasting, and oh my goodness, the aroma and flavor were wonderful. Tonight's dinner will be lamb sandwiches. I love leftovers. I love not having to cook the next day after a big dinner.

This weather makes me want to knit. Other than a pair of socks languishing on the needles for the last year, I haven't really had any projects to work on. So I used a gift certificate I'd received last year to a local yarn store and purchased some yarn to make something for DD17. Of course, now I want to make something for me too, but I generally end up finishing only one big project a season. We'll see if I can make faster progress.

A Fish Dish that Works for Us

Last night I made salmon burgers. It's been hard trying to work more fish into our diets, and there are so many issues to consider with seafood. We're supposed to consider farm-raised versus wild, contaminants like mercury, freshness, and omega-3 levels. Most of all, however, will the kids eat it?

I think I found a winner in salmon burgers. Yes, the first half-dozen times I made them, the reception was lukewarm. But I think the kids have slowly come to like them and even appreciate their goodness. (I talk up the nutrition every meal, to some eye-rolling, but I think they get it.) My version of salmon burgers is easy and good for all of us:

• I use canned, wild Alaskan red sockeye salmon for higher nutrition, lower cost, and convenience. BJs Wholesale Club has good prices for the Bumble Bee brand.
• I add finely chopped veggies like green peppers or celery and herbs for more flavor. Sometimes I'll use a dash of tabasco.
• You can add wheat germ, ground flaxseed, or even oatmeal to the bread crumbs for a binder.
• They are low in saturated fat compared to beef burgers.
• They are high in good-for-your heart omega-3s.
• You can top them with lettuce and tomato for yet more veggie nutrition and flavor.

For my family, I'll use two 14.75 oz cans. I rinse the contents under running water to lower the sodium a bit, and then mix the salmon with two eggs and one cup of whole wheat bread crumbs plus any diced veggies I have on hand. Assemble into burgers and refrigerate for about 30 minutes to set.

I cook the salmon burgers on my George Foreman grill, but they can be pan-fryed. I don't think they'd survive the outdoor grill as they are too delicate. Serve on rolls, and (optionally) top with a little bit of tartar sauce.